Hello Scenic News readers! Welcome to a very special edition of the Health and Wellness column. Many years ago, I was a ‘yes’ person. Not because I felt it was rewarding, or improving my life in any meaningful way, it simply became habit.

It became a part of my life: someone would ask me to pick something up, I would say ‘yes’. Someone would ask me to work a shift, I would say ‘yes’. And if someone asked me to volunteer, do a favour, go to an event, cook something, bring something, repair something, literally anything, I would say ‘yes’. I couldn’t possibly let anyone down. And the fear of missing out seemed soul crushing.
This decision became catastrophic, and I didn’t even realise it. I was rushing constantly, making up excuses for why things were late or why a deadline wasn’t met. I put pressure on my family to help me achieve all the ‘yes’ things. I became extremely fatigued, lost, overwhelmed and started putting 50% of me into everything. Nothing was all-in anymore.
Something so simple as a friend asking me to coffee on a day when I was flat out, would make my mind go crazy. Stressed looking at the time. And how much time I didn’t have left to finish what I needed to. I could have said, ‘thanks for the invite, today’s not great what about Tuesday?’ But I said ‘yes’ instead.
And then the moment happened, and I crashed. Exhaustion, moodiness, difficult conversations people needed to have with me to understand why I just wasn’t myself anymore. And I realised that saying ‘no’ now was a requirement. It wasn’t selfish, it was responsible.
That choice to say ‘no’ more changed everything. Some people who were in my life, vanished, the added tasks I put on myself suddenly weren’t important or required anymore. I had time to do things I enjoyed. There was less rushing. More sleeping. More relaxing. More quality.
Yes, there are still busy periods, and that’s life. Those periods are unavoidable. I am incredibly selective of what I put my time into now. That time is precious, and the people you give it to are well deserving of it.
Being a ‘yes’ person can be incredibly challenging to shift away from. And if you believe you need to say ‘no’ a little more often, baby steps are the key.
Whether it’s activity you agreed to, or an activity you set in your mind and has become habit, you can always choose to say ‘no’. At any time. I started saying ‘no’ to nurture and improve my mental health. Just like saying ‘no’ to a marathon when you have a pinched nerve in your back. Rest, recover, reconsider if you need to. And more importantly, why do that to yourself?
Value your time, value you.
As always, spread kindness like it’s jam on toast.
Rebecca – Naturally COS